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Big chat today, Dears! That is because I’m so happy to introduce you to a new quiz and a new guide—both of them are designed to help you increase your odds of reaching your goal!
The great thing is, it doesn’t matter what your goal is, what area of your life, and how simple or complex it may be, I’m going to share with you some of the things that are in this guide and some of the questions that are in this quiz, so that you can get an idea of what all impacts your odds of reaching your goal and then get a sense of where you might a little bit on the low side. And where there are opportunities for you to improve that!
So, feeling quite fancy you guys, because I have this little lower third, which is exciting. So I’m going to change that up. And we’re gonna talk about—look at that! Yeah! This is the new quiz! You can find it at mapyourprogress.com/odds And I wanted to create this quiz to give us a way to self-measure where we’re at, what things would make a difference.
Because for most people, when they want to achieve something, have some kind of goal, there tends to be excitement and also a little bit of anxiety, in terms of how it’s going to go.
Of course, as the outset, we have these ideas, these dreams, a vision of how amazing it’s going to feel. Then as we get going, sometimes, it can be like, “Oh God, but what if it doesn’t work out?”
So I’m gonna jump into one of the first questions, first things that I cover in this guide, which is free, by the way, it’s my gift to you.
So the number one things to look at, is—hold on a second—fear. Just looking at fear and if it’s getting in the way. If you are a human person, the answer is almost always going to be yes.
Precious few of us have mastered fear and are able to blow through it all the time. Unfortunately, I was just having this conversation the other day, I think often times we misunderstand fear. When there’s a goal that’s really important to us, something that is particularly meaningful, that’s usually when our Clever Brain starts to ramp up the internal messaging that’s all based in perceived fear.
Clever Brain is what I call the part of our brain that’s like internal propaganda, it sources these thoughts that are solely designed to shut you down and to keep you from moving forward, keep you from making progress.
So I’ve actually got some examples in the guide, of those types of thoughts, and what they look like. The things that gets tricky about understanding fear, and how it might be getting in the way, is because again: It comes from Clever Brain. I call Clever Brain “clever” because it’s CLEVAAAAHHH!
It’s really hard sometimes to understand where that fear is interfering, because it sounds so reasonable. It sounds so logical. So: Take the quiz, see how you score in that area, and then check the guide for some additional tips on how you can move through that.
Okay, let’s talk number two! Consistency. That’s another big thing that people get hung up with when it comes to goals. They get a little twitchy at the outset, because most of us don’t really trust ourselves when it comes to being consistent over the long haul. I certainly am a sprinter-type where things can start out very well and it goes amazing until something happens. Until something goes differently, unexpectedly, I get sick, whatever. Something shifts and then I am falling off-track.
So what I really want you to think about when it comes to consistency is remembering that consistency just a whole bunch of next right steps done consistently *enough.* I am not one who advocates for being hyper-meticulous about how it has to be this, this, this and this, or else it’s not consistent. I think that can actually undermine creating some momentum toward your goal.
But just consider the next right step. Instead of worrying about, are you going to be able to keep it up, what is it going to look like in the future, just focus on the next right step, the next action there is to take, to move you toward your goal.
Alright, let’s talk three! Three is about winning at life. “Winning at life” is the expression I use where you are happy to be alive, you are in pursuit of a goal, something that’s meaningful to you, you feel like you’re growing, you feel like you’re making progress, and you’re feeling more and more powerful. Like, *proud* of yourself.
Winning at life is feeling proud. That doesn’t mean that you feel proud 24/7 or happy 24/7. We are human beings. We have a whole spectrum of emotion, and it’s just this overall sense, that there’s a momentum happening in your life and that you feel like you’re going somewhere—that you’re getting toward your goal.
So winning at life, definitely important. To look at what that is for you, and that’s really the key to creating that sustainable momentum. There’s no one right answer for what winning at life looks like. The only one that really matters I think, is how you define that. Sometimes that is even a brave act, to announce that winning at life, for you, looks like doing something that is not really approved of by your family, or is not readily understood by the people around you. But don’t worry about that, just stay focused on what that win looks like for you.
Now let’s think about how your goal may relate to your purpose. This is one that I think makes Map Your Progress perhaps a little bit different than other conversations about setting goals and looking at progress in general. I’m a big proponent in having progress be meaningful. And it really aligned with what matters to you. Of course, we all have different definitions of what matters. I’ve created a tool, on mapyourprogress.com, that is actually another quiz—a different quiz. It’s at mapyourprogress.com/quiz. That one is actually to help you get more clear on what it is that you want to contribute to the world, the difference that you want to make. The way I describe it is the light you want to bring. I have this idea that, at our best, humans are capable of being lights in the world. We’re able to contribute and be constructive and share something unique that only we can do in the way that we do it.
So when you consider that, and whatever it is that you want to contribute to the world, think about how that relates to your goal.
I encourage you, of course, to take the quiz, check out the different light types on mapyourprogress.com/lights and really think about, what goal is it that you’re looking at right now, that seems like the next right thing for you to go after, and how is that going to get you closer to whatever it is that you *really* want.
So, I think where I see people getting stuck is that they are focused on goals that aren’t necessarily about what they really, really want. I’ve got some questions and things for you to consider in the guide, that can help you get a bit more clear on what goal would be aligned with what it is that you’re doing. And P/S I’m currently doing something for new Mappers, those of you that are buying Progress Maps, I’m actually offering some support and some customized recommendations to help you make sure that your goal is aligned with what matters most to you—and your greater purpose. So, just putting that out there! It’s something that I don’t know that I’ll be able to offer going forward, but for right now, it’s something that I’m happy to do.
Let’s look at five! Considering your goal, is it something that you really want? This can actually really decrease your odds of reaching it if it’s not something that really matters to you. This is kind of a theme I’m sure you’re picking up on. I can see how people choose goals based on what they think they *should* do or what they’re *supposed* to do or to prove something to someone else or “well if I do this, then maybe this person will love me, maybe they’ll approve of me, maybe then they’ll want to be in my life more.” We make up all kinds of logic about what achieving goals represents.
So really encourage you to think about: Who are you doing this for? And making sure that this goal is one that matters to you. Even if it seems like, “oh yeah, everybody’s supposed to save money, or everybody’s supposed to be healthy, or everybody’s supposed to meditate.” I don’t know that that’s true!
I think that it’s important what would make *you* feel alive and like you’re winning at life, and that is aligned with your greater purpose, so you can see there’s some overlap here. But just looking at what that would be for you.
Number six! Have you tried this before? That can absolutely have an impact on your odds of reaching your goal. Unfortunately, I think we tend to prioritize the failures that we’ve had in the past. I define failure as anytime life doesn’t go the way that you want it to go! Which means there’s plenty of opportunity for failure, on a daily basis.
But when you think about the past and how things have gone before, unfortunately, I notice people getting very judgmental and critical with themselves. Like they should have know something different, they should have known better, they should be able to do it already.
You know, that’s something that Clever Brain loves to use to disempower you and shut you down. But, it’s mean! We wouldn’t do that to other people. It’s like we judge our past self based on what we know now. So we judge ourself retroactively on things that we couldn’t have known at the time.
When you think about “have you tried this goal before” and maybe it didn’t go well in the past, consider that who you are right now, is different than who you were then. Even if it may not seem super obvious, there are still things that you know now that you didn’t then.
And of course if you are part of our Tribe, then you now have tools. You have strategies. You have support from me—things you didn’t have before. So don’t worry if it’s not gone so well in the past. It doesn’t mean that it’s not going to go well going forward.
Number seven! Do you rely on others. I want to distinguish reliance as it’s different from support. Support is a really lovely thing, where we might have people around us, supporting us, encouraging us, giving us advice—anything that helps us be more empowered to do our actions, take our next right steps, is wonderful.
But when you’re looking at your goal, and thinking about the odds of reaching it, they can do seriously down if you are making your goal dependent on the actions of other people.
It’s not to say that I don’t encourage people to have shared goals or group goals—sometimes teams will use Progress Maps—and that’s wonderful.
And yet, I think it’s imperative that your actions are clearly defined and that you’re not judging yourself or staking your momentum on what somebody else does or does not do. This is where boundaries become really important!
Particularly as it relates to goals, it’s important to think about the things that you have control over, and what you actually have the ability to affect change on. Because when you get confused and muddled, and you’re waiting on other people to do stuff, and they’re not doing things the way you want to do them, or as fast as you want to do them, then it can be really discouraging and get you off track.
So I really encourage you to get very clear on your part, the lane that you are supposed to be in, the actions you are to take and map *that.* Focus on making progress in a way that is empowering to you.
Number eight! Would you be upset if you didn’t reach this goal? I think it’s really important to be choosing goals that you *would* be upset—it means that there’s something at stake. It means that there’s something that matters to you. I know that for some folks, they might interpret that as, “not being positive” or not accepting how things are going or whatnot. I think that’s sort of misinterpretation.
I think that being upset can actually be very constructive and very much a positive thing in that it’s a reaction, a response to something that is important to you. It’s human to be upset when something that we value is threatened. I want you to consider going after goals that would be upsetting, were you not to reach them. A few more tips about that in the guide.
Then nine! Do you have what you need? This is not the time to MacGyver. When you are looking at your goal, when you’re trying to make progress, this is not the time to just try and grind through and not set yourself up to win. There are things that you need. There’s tools, there’s time, a really common one for people, where you’ve got to set boundaries and carving out time of our schedules. That’s a place where we can often benefit from support from others. Especially those of you that are parents—maybe having some folks be able to watch your kids or create pockets—whatever time that you need to do that actions. Really important to give yourself the tools.
There are not any awards for making it harder, for suffering or for being a martyr. It just gets in the way. It’s a distraction.
So increase your odds by giving yourself what it is that you need, and allowing yourself to adjust as you go. If new things come up that you need, fantastic. Great! Just go ahead and take the steps you need to give yourself whatever it is that’s going to allow you to reach your goal.
The last thing that I want touch on—number 10—is are you taking excellent care of yourself? This is another one that is perhaps unique to Map Your Progress in the general goals/progress discussion. I really, really believe that all of our long-term progress, the momentum that we can sustain, is based on how we treat ourselves.
There’s nobody else in the world that knows you more than you. That has been through everything with you, that is privy to every thought, every feeling, that knows exactly what’s going on. So if you think of yourself as having sort of a partnership. I realize this is a little like Jedi mind-trick kind of thing, considering yourself and becoming the person that you most need, the person who responds to you, whatever it is that you might need in a given moment. That might be rest! It might be sandwich. It might be taking some time away from your computer and hanging out with your dog.
But whatever those things are, that contribute to your well-being, and to caring well for yourself, really important.
So those are the ten things! Those are the ten questions that you’re gonna get in the quiz and then they are the ten things that I’m going to go into much greater detail in the guide.
I’m going to bust out my next fancy technology trick here. Yeah, there we go! Ok! So, the guide includes something really important. It is actually a two-page deal. The guide is longer than two pages, but there is a two-page scorecard.
I’ve created this because I wanted you to be able to take action and get more specific about what’s really going on—beyond just the quiz. The quiz is fun, it’s a wonderful way to see where you’re trending in terms of the odds. Then the guide is where you can really start to dig into things and get much more specific.
So I created a scorecard that has these ten questions, these ten areas, whoops, that’s a lot of bright white. You can go ahead and rate yourself—scale of one to ten—in each of these areas. So when you download the guide, please print out at least these two pages.
But resist any urges to immediately fill it out. I want you to *use* the guide and the details that I go into, the specific tips and recommendations that I offer, to help you fill this out, k? So does that make sense?
You’re going to download the guide, print out at least these two scorecard pages, and then read through and fill out your score for each one of these items as you go. I think that’s the way to get the most out of it.
Oh, Tazz! You’re saying: I just downloaded the guide. Looks awesome.” Thank you, so much! I’m so happy to hear that! I’m excited about this one, guys—I nerded out quite a bit about this. Oh, and then we’ve got Isobel! Hello! So good to see you, Dear.
You know, I really encourage you to take the opportunity to dig in a little bit deeper. In using the scorecard, you can start to see which areas you might want to prioritize in terms of improving or where you think you might like some additional support.
One very important thing about this guide: I didn’t want to just leave you with like, “Ok, so I took the quiz, and then I downloaded the guide, and I have the scores an—now what?” I mean, the guide absolutely has some specific tips and actions that you can take, but for some of you, you may want to take that further. That may be just the start of a conversation.
And so I’m offering you guys an opportunity, for those of you that download the guide, you fill out your scorecard, if you scan that, or just take a photo of it, and send that to me, at firstname.lastname@example.org then it gives me an opportunity to be able to reach back out to you and we can actually have a conversation about this. And see more specifically, for you, with whatever your goal is and wherever you’re at, what you can do to improve those odds, in a really tangible, meaningful way.
So, excited for you guys to try this out. Just went up today, the response has already been really good. If there are not any other questions, from those of you that are here, I will look forward to seeing you all next Friday. Fridays at 3pm Pacific, we do these chats. Love to be able to see you guys and happy to answer any questions if you are watching this in the replay.
Alright, Dears! So go forth, you’re going to go take the quiz at mapyourprogress.com/odds and that is where you will go through the ten questions, it takes literally an average of I think a minute and twenty-six seconds, I’m going to nerd out with backend statistics. A minute and twenty-six seconds is what it takes the average person to answer and get your result in terms of your odds of reaching your goal.
Then you will see a link there, on your results page, that can take you directly to the guide, where you can download, print out your scorecard, fill it out and then send it to me!
Alight, Dears—thanks for being with us, and I will see you next week! Bye!